I didn’t murder anybody today and have received absolutely zero credit.

In fact, every morning I wake up and don’t:

• Murder someone

• Hurt anyone

• Lie (much)

• Cheat

• Sit on my arse, moaning, eating an entire loaf of Jasons sourdough

And yet no one notices. Seems unfair to me.

Every day we resist an urge, a spiral, a stupid argument.

We hold back, stay kind, stay sane.

No one claps.

No medals for not yelling at your kids.

No trophies for deleting that message.

No applause for staying sober, sane, or silent.

That’s the problem with life — we reward achievement and overlook restraint.

The quiet decisions that keep us decent never make the highlight reel.

We talk endlessly about doing more: more goals, more growth, more hustle.

But most of what keeps the world running are the invisible moments of not doing.

Not reacting. Not quitting. Not taking the bait.

That’s the discipline that holds everything together — the uncelebrated art of doing nothing stupid today.

So if you’re feeling behind, or like you’ve done “nothing,” try this reframe:

You didn’t “do nothing.”

You just quietly prevented a crime spree — that’s what self-control looks like from the outside.

So well done. I am clapping for you. Anyway, back to the question.

Be honest. How many people have you murdered today?

No specifics. Just a general number is fine.

Midlife is a dirty word.

This is a place for those who hate the cliché—but know they’re in it.

People who think: how the f*ck am I this old?

Not a “club” yet — but it will be. For now, it’s a start.

I’m looking for the early crew.

I’ll show you how to think, act, and feel more alive than 97% of people your age.

Right now, Anti-Midlife Club™ is one weekly email: anti-cliché tools, ideas, and truths to give you an edge.

• BODY (Fitness + Health + Hedonism)

• MIND (Mindset + Thinking + Ideas)

• LIFE (Family + Work + Choices)

• CULTURE (Music + Taste + Vices)

• MEANING (Mortality + Humour + Purpose)

Everything that matters.

We don’t go gentle into that good night, we rage against the dying of the light.

We conspire to stay fitter, stronger, more relevant, and in the 3%.

Join me and we’ll stand shoulder to shoulder.

If you’re here now, you’re early. You found it before it was cool.

Your best years are not behind you.

Resist Midlife™.

—Kris Bromley, Founder of Anti-Midlife Club™

Feature

🔥 Midlife Crisis: Why 97% of People Settle

You can’t avoid a midlife crisis. But you can turn it into fuel.

Forget clichés. Midlife isn’t leather trousers or yoga retreats.
It’s survival. Reinvention. A chunky broth of regret and potential.

👉 If you only read one thing this week, make it this.

Read the Full Post.

Subscribe now

Stealth Fitness

💪 705 Press-Ups with Kids on My Back

60 seconds of midlife gym-hacking. No membership. No excuses.

👉 Watch it HERE →

Anti-Midlife Icons

Princess Leia on the gear

Translation for Anti-Midlife thinking:

Most people waste midlife reminiscing about the past.

The real rebellion is to create stories now that are worth bragging about later.

Until next time

Number 3 in the bag. If you’re here, you’re still early. You found it before everyone else was talking about it.

👉 Why not join me on Instagram? Go on, you follow miles worse people.

Resist Midlife™.

Kris Bromley x

🎧 Prefer to listen to my calming voice? Play the 4-min audio version above.👆

The phrase “midlife crisis” makes most people dry heave.

But I’d argue crisis isn’t unusual — it’s the default setting of midlife.

Accept that, and you finally have leverage to play with.

Midlife is a meme you didn’t ask to be in.

You know what I mean:

• Have an affair with anyone who accidentally brushes your arm.

• Buy a daft sports car you can’t fit the kids in.

• Sign up for a triathlon even though you can’t swim and you hate people wearing cycling shorts.

• Install Ableton because you’re going to finally be a DJ.

• Obsessively measure out your daily creatine and collagen. Strap on your weighted vest. Ignore your family while checking Instagram.

• Get a bad leather jacket, or a bad sleeve tattoo, and start microdosing Ozempic.

• Start to think ‘those Skechers do look comfy’

Or is that last one just me?

Schrödinger’s Midlife™

Midlife is Schrödinger’s box.

Like the little cat inside, you exist in multiple states.

• You’re dead, you’re alive.

• Your body weakens, your sense of self hardens.

• You’re at parents’ evening on Tuesday and a crematorium on Friday.

• You’re stockpiling supplements for eternal life while Googling how to write your will.

• You’re trapped by responsibility, liberated by finally not giving a fuck.

• You’ve outgrown the person you used to pretend to be, but you don’t know who’s left.

The secret lies in embracing the paradox and learning to live in the contradiction.

Subscribe now

Because a midlife crisis isn’t something you have to do. It’s something you get to do (if you’re lucky).

And if you can carry the weight for long enough — the mess, the humour, the scars, the grief, the absurdity — you can turn it into fuel.

It starts to become a nourishing, hearty, premium broth that feeds your next chapter.

It’s Midlife Soup™.

No, sorry you can’t send it back — it’s the only dish on the menu.

You can’t avoid a midlife crisis.

It’s the final rite of passage.

(Unless we’re counting death).

And inside it sits the raw material of your life:

• The things you swore you’d do. The distractions you chose instead.

• The nights you felt immortal. The nights you’d rather forget.

• The burnt bridges. The friends that stuck around.

• Parents fading, kids selfishly refusing to not grow up.

• The versions of yourself left in other people’s memories.

• The childhood you never really left. The adult you never really became.

• The unanswered texts. The photos you can’t lose. The inside jokes. The ghosts in your bones.

• The one that got away.

• The thrills, pills, and bellyaches.

• The boredom, and the freedom, and the time spent alone.

• The how the fuck am I this old?

• The is this it?

If you can make friends with the midlife paradox — it starts to reveal who you are, what you actually want, and what you can let go.

Most people will flinch and look away. Or do something stupid.

But if you embrace it, you stop living on autopilot. You waste less time chasing distractions. You see truths others can’t.

You move through midlife with an unfair advantage.

Where they see crisis, you’ve found clarity. While they chase endings, you’ve found leverage.

That’s the Anti-Midlife mindset.

P.S. If you want a hand carrying the weight, that’s what I do 1:1.

Another week, another set of ways to stay sharper, stronger, and harder to kill.

Subscribe now

Roundup

💪 How to Get Ripped Watching Football on TV

The EMOM trick that turns dead screen time into stealth fitness.

[Read it →]

🥴 The Annoying Truth About Diets, Workouts, and Midlife

The two words that nobody likes.

[Read it →]

🔥 The Things I Never Regret — and the Ones I Always Do

The high-return habits worth repeating, and the low-return ones to quit.

[Read it →]

Extra Bit

“Most people fail because they become paralyzed by their fear.

You have to choose:

👉 Face your fears and go see what your life can really be.

👉 Or succumb and do exactly what you’ve always done.

When you pick the latter, you’ve already failed — because you didn’t even attempt to win.”

— Seth Godin

Translation for Anti-Midlife thinking:

Fear shrinks most people at midlife. Action expands you.
Choose the possibility of progress over the certainty of nothing.

Until next time

If you’re here, you’re still early. You found it before everyone was talking about.

Resist Midlife™.

Kris Bromley x

P.S. If you want help making sense of your own mix — habits, vices, blind spots — that’s the work I do 1:1. More here →

Subscribe now

There are only a handful of things I never regret doing:

• Working out

• Meditating

• Talking to someone and getting things off my chest

Working out is ingrained. That habit stuck, and it helps me fight the autopilot behaviours I do regret.

The other two?

Meditation pulls me out of attention traps.

Talking to someone lifts the weight off my chest every time.

Yet I never seem to actually do them.

Meanwhile, the things I do regret are effortless:

• Scrolling in a fog

• Listening to low-level people repeat opinions they just saw online

• Watching TV every night even though I haven’t enjoyed anything since my sixth rewatch of The Sopranos

• Reading the news—always a net negative, full of rage and opportunity cost. Most people do it. You can’t, if you want an unusual life.

And the morale-sapping reality is: there’s no neat fix.

No clever system that makes this go away.

Just the daily, boring battle of noticing and trying:

Do the regretful behaviour.

Notice you’re in the fog.

Pause.

Bring your attention back.

Do something less regretful.

Slip again.

Repeat.

Subscribe now

So here’s the dare: make your own never-regret list.

Write down the things you always feel better for doing—and send them to me. I’ll share my thoughts.

If you can’t name any, that’s a problem.

And if you can but you’re still not doing them—welcome to midlife.

That’s the fog.

And if you want help finding your list—or sticking to it—that’s exactly what I work on in 1:1 coaching.

👉 Liked this? Hit the ❤️ or forward it to a friend.

You’re looking very handsome/suave/cool/pretty/wise today.

Welcome to the first issue of Anti-Midlife Club™ in newsletter form.

Here’s what happened this week…

Roundup

💀 I Survived Death at 15 — Now I’m Defying Midlife

A coma, a 5% survival chance, and a tale of strangling nurses.

[Read it →]

📜 About Anti-Midlife Club

What this is, what it isn’t, and why your best years aren’t behind you.

[Read it →]

Extra Bit

Translation for anti-midlife thinking:

I love being annoyed/moaning as much as the next person, but it’s a trap.

Staying stuck is average. Staying in love is rare. That’s your edge.

Until next time

If you’re here now, you’re early. You found it before it was cool.

Resist Midlife™.

Kris Bromley x

Everyone wants the one true answer.

The hack. The shortcut. The 30-day fix.

But here’s the annoying truth about every diet, workout, and “secret” midlife plan:

It depends.

Annoying, right?

Nobody likes that answer.

We want guarantees, gurus, and gospel.

But the older you get, the more obvious it becomes:

Your body, mind, and life are unique.

What works for someone at 35 won’t work for you at 47.

Different genetics. Different hormones. Different stress. Different habits. Different everything.

Once you accept that, you’re free.

Free from dogma. Free from tribes. Free from magic bullets.

Instead, you experiment.

You test.

You find your edge.

That’s how you end up stronger, sharper, and more alive than 97% of your peers.

That’s what Anti-Midlife Club™ is about:

Refusing clichés. Refusing average.

Tools. Ideas. Truths. Edge.

Start with this:

Instead of asking “Does this diet/workout/life hack work?”

Ask: “Does it work for me, right now?”

That’s the real shortcut.

The one most people will never take.

👉 Want more edge like this? Join the weekly Anti-Midlife Club™ email.

I accidentally did 705 push-ups watching Liverpool. Here’s how.

I’ve wasted an obscene amount of my life on football. Watching it. Playing it. Reading about it.

I’ve tried cutting back, knowing I’ll feel guilty afterwards, but it’s hard to remove such a habitual part of my life.

The problem: ninety minutes of dead time.

The solution: turn it into a stealth workout.

The EMOM Trick

Here’s the move:

• Kickoff → 15 push-ups.

• Rest until the next minute.

• Next :00, do 15 more.

• Repeat. Every minute. On the minute.

See if you can get to half-time.

It’s surprisingly fun.

You can even watch the footy during the press-up if you position yourself carefully and don’t value your neck.

Subscribe now

When 705 Push-Ups Sneak Up on You

The first time I tried this, I just… kept going. One push-up set led to another, and before I knew it, I’d done 15 per minute for the entire first half plus injury time.

47 minutes.

705 push-ups.

Seven hundred and five!

I would never walk into a gym planning to do that many. But that’s the magic of stealth fitness: it sneaks past your brain’s excuses.

Tips for Front Room Fitness

• Adjust your reps. 10 if you’re new, 20 if you chase the pump.

• Play with variations - diamond push-ups are a beast.

• Do it first half, then watch the second guilt-free.

• Throw in sit-ups at half-time or air squats during ads.

Yes, you will ache. That’s the point. Welcome to Ripped City (population: you).

Why Bother?

You shouldn’t. You shouldn’t even watch football. The modern game is rubbish. Priced out of reach of the common man. Devoid of characters and flair.

But if you’re going to watch it anyway, at least end with something to show for it: a chest, shoulders, and arms that didn’t exist before kick-off.

It’s batching. It’s gamified habit-stacking. It’s turning a “bad” habit into a “better” one. And it’s very satisfying.

Just… don’t smash your nose into the carpet when your team scores and you throw your hands up.

Gooooaaaallll.

If you want more ways to EARN YOUR VICES and turn guilty pleasures into progress, subscribe to Anti-Midlife Club™.

👉 Living in Ripped City? Tap the ❤️ or send this to a mate.

🎧 Reading things is for boomers. Why not play the one-take audio version above instead.👆

At fifteen, I was given a 5% chance of survival.

Meningococcal meningitis septicaemia.

Brutal name. Brutal disease.

The fun:

• Waking up covered in tiny black bruises.

• Projectile vomit worthy of The Exorcist.

• Being wheeled into an ambulance with the neighbours watching — and, a hazy memory of my penis poking out my pyjamas.

• My family being told to prepare for amputations, deafness, brain damage… or my funeral.

• A week in a coma. Another in a tropical disease ward, where doctors flew in just to gawp. Mum sleeping in my room every night.

• My hair turned ginger. My body shed 2.5 stone in a few days.

• Holes in my heel and my arse cheek that fused painfully to the bedsheets.

• Steroids so strong I threatened to strangle the nurses, producing swearing so creative even the hardest 15-year-old would blush.

• Photographed naked for medical journals as my scars were so mad (or at least that’s what they said the nude pics were for).

• Six months recovering at home. Half a school year gone. A year of weakness.

To be honest, I don’t remember the horror of it (drugs are great) — but my family do.

When I woke up, I was alive — scarred, skeletal, but still with all my limbs.

And another chance.

That brush with death didn’t make me fearless.

But it did give me perspective.

It made me desperate not to waste the rest of my life.

It made me impatient. A bit of an outsider. Allergic to average.

It made me want to find every tool, trick, and edge I could — from fitness to thinking to humour — to improve my odds of a meaningful, unusual life.

They said I’d never be fit again.

At 48, I’m fitter than I was at 38 or 28.

Just like my illness, midlife isn’t inevitable decline.

It’s raw material.

Proof that you can use chaos, scars, and doubt as fuel.

If I can do that with 5% odds, you can do a lot more than just survive at 35, 45, or 55.

You can be sharper, stronger, funnier, fitter, and more relevant than 97% of your peers.

That’s the edge you’ll get inside Anti-Midlife Club™.

No coma required.

RESIST MIDLIFE.

Join me.

👉 Like this? Tap the ❤️ or send it to a friend.

Welcome to Anti-Midlife Club™

Midlife is a dirty word.

This is a place for those who hate the cliché—but know they’re in it.

People who think: how the f*ck am I this old?

Not a “club” yet — but it will be. For now, it’s a start.

I’m looking for the early crew.

I’ll show you how to think, act, and feel more alive than 97% of people your age.

Right now, Anti-Midlife Club™ is one weekly email: anti-cliché tools, ideas, and truths to give you an edge.

• BODY (Fitness + Health + Hedonism)

• MIND (Mindset + Thinking + Ideas)

• LIFE (Family + Work + Choices)

• CULTURE (Music + Taste + Vices)

• MEANING (Mortality + Humour + Purpose)

Everything that matters.

We don’t go gentle into that good night, we rage against the dying of the light.

We conspire to stay fitter, stronger, more relevant, and in the 3%.

Join me and we’ll stand shoulder to shoulder.

If you’re here now, you’re early. You found it before it was cool.

Your best years are not behind you.

Resist Midlife™.

—Kris Bromley, Founder of Anti-Midlife Club™

Why listen to me? Good question. About Me →